My Last Birthday Supper, originally uploaded by Chris Abraham.

This is my lovely and wonderful birthday dinner — my last supper, as mid-30s. I am now, officially, a man in his late-thirties. Notice Jesus and Mary Magdalene, they’re Frank and Claudia. Also there are Wolf and Natascha and Anneta and more. Wonderful restaurant called Café Aroma. If you’re in Berlin, I can highly recommend this Italian “slow food” restaurant. Frank is a huge food snob and this is his very favorite restaurant in Berlin.

Patio Cafe on the River Spree, originally uploaded by Chris Abraham.

It is an ancient Berlin tradition to take your family and go for a day-long walk together in Sundays. I love this tradition. Well, last Sunday was exceptionally warm, clear, and lovely. I joined Frank and Claudia on their family walk-about with their two sons and we ended up at our favorite cafe, PATIO Berlin, for some sushi, soup, beer, and yakitori, etc. I love the Spree river. I love the city. I adore the Sunday tradition of going for a very gentle walk, all together as a family, along the Spree and through the parks and forests.

A couple months ago I received an email in response the resume I posted on Craig’s List from Dr. Sadie Allison, America’s Pleasure Coach, proprietor of TickleKitty and the Tickle Kitty store.

David and I met Sadie for drinks at the Beach Chalet while I was in San Francisco on business. The three of us talked for a couple hours. Sadie has penned three sex-help books, Tickle Your Fancy, Toygasms!, and Tickle His Pickle. Before we left, we received all three books, and an assortment of strawberry and au naturel Slippery Kitty.

Sadie was super cool. Dr. Sadie sent me home with lots of books and lots of lube. In fact, on the night of the big Grotto halloween party the following weekend, Oliver, Emily, and I handed out the assortment of strawberry lube and plain lube as well as the books in lieu of candy, which I failed to buy. Emily is so cute she makes me cry so it was less creepy for her to hand out these things to all the pretty people who attended the party. It was a serious hit.

Meet Dr. Sadie Allison, America’s Pleasure Coach

People have personal coaches for sports, careers, fitness, finances—even makeovers. Now a new coach is being welcomed into America’s homes to show women, men and couples how to enjoy more fulfilling, passionate sex. Meet America’s Pleasure Coach, Dr. Sadie Allison.

“There’s still so much that people want to learn about sexual pleasure, but don’t know where to turn,” says author Sadie Allison. “They find when they reach for my how-to sex help books, more than just the light bulb turns on!”

Dr. Sadie’s secret? “Pleasure techniques presented in a fun, inviting way,” she says about her line of bestselling books. “I then tastefully illustrate all the techniques so people want to race home to try them.”

With over 500,000 copies in print, all of Dr. Sadie’s books, Tickle Your Fancy, Toygasms!, and Tickle His Pickle instantly zoomed up the charts and became national bestsellers, each receiving the prestigious Independent Publishers Best Sexuality Book Award. Dr. Sadie also created a line of FDA-approved pleasure lubricants, Slippery Kitty, and a popular line of sensual toys called Dr. Sadie’s Pleasure Kits, to suit every passion, occasion and experience level.

Dr. Sadie educates millions as a repeat guest on numerous TV and radio programs including E! Entertainment TV, Oxygen TV’s Talk Sex with Sue Johanson, Discovery Health Channel’s Berman & Berman, Playboy TV’s Sexcetera, Showtime’s Family Business, Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla’s Loveline, Howard Stern and more. She’s also a regularly quoted sex authority in national magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Redbook, Glamour, AVN, and Publishers Weekly, and is a sought-after speaker.

Dr. Sadie Allison is a graduate of San Diego State University with a B.A. in French and Marketing, and completed her Doctorate in Human Sexuality from San Francisco’s Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. She’s a certified sexologist and member of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors & Therapists (AASECT). As founder and Kitty-In-Chief of Tickle Kitty, Inc., Dr. Sadie also runs a thriving publishing company and internet business (www.ticklekitty.com). She was born, raised, and still lives in the city by the bay, and spends her days writing, jogging across the Golden Gate Bridge and hosting dinner parties with friends.

Woman Turns Touchy Subject Into Touching Success Story

For Sadie Allison, it all began back in high school with a shy whisper from a curious girlfriend.

“How do I do it?”

The intensely personal question was about masturbating, a mystery no one had ever helped her solve. Ms. Allison, ever-comfortable with her own body, caringly answered her friend’s question. Then another. And another. News of her confidential advice-giving spread quickly, and she soon became known as the campus “Dr. Ruth”—a nickname that stuck through college. But Ms. Allison had questions of her own. Why was there so much confusion? Was there no trusted source her friends could turn to for advice on sexual pleasure?

After earning her B.A. in French, Ms. Allison moved on to a fast-paced sales career in high-tech, but never stopped thinking about the need for quality advice and information about sex. A passionate entrepreneur at heart, she decided to redirect her career to publish sex-help books. How could she have known that her first book, Tickle Your Fancy—A Woman’s Guide To Sexual Self-Pleasure would allow her to trade her life in Silicon Valley for a career in silicone toys?

Bypassing the big New York publishers, Ms Allison started Tickle Kitty in her tiny San Francisco apartment. “At first, it was just me, my dwindling savings, no publishing know-how, and a steady chorus of nay-sayers,” admits Ms. Allison. “But my goal was to reach out to enhance people’s sex lives—and it worked.”

In just a few years, Tickle Kitty catapulted to success: three bestsellers, a website filled with scores of upscale sex toys, publishing awards, original lines of pleasure kits and lubricants, as well as speaking engagements and TV appearances for the Kitty-In-Chief. “And a move out of that tiny apartment,” she adds proudly.

What’s next? “Everyone deserves more pleasure, and I’m happy to provide it,” says Ms. Allison, who always has new sex-help books in development. “I guess I’ll never be satisfied till everyone else is satisfied!”

Tickle Kitty’s Entire Mission Told In Just Three Words

How many CEOs can pack the full power of their corporate mission into three irresistible words?

For Sadie Allison, it’s easy: More Powerful Orgasms.

This arousing human desire is what makes her company Tickle Kitty purr. “We’re here to inspire positive change in peoples’ lives,” observes Ms. Allison, Tickle Kitty’s Kitty-In-Chief. “We clear out old inhibitions by providing the accurate information they need for more frequent, more intimate, more uninhibited sexual pleasure.”

Discovering the key to greater erotic passion begins not with vibrating toys, but with vibrant knowledge. That’s Tickle Kitty’s specialty. “We create the how-to sex guides you wish you’d read sooner in life,” notes Ms. Allison, author of bestsellers Tickle Your Fancy, Toygasms!, and her latest gem, Tickle His Pickle. “These books are fun, informative and honest, so you can be inspired to explore all the sexual pleasure and fulfillment you have coming to you.”

Her tastefully illustrated books also serve to whet erotic appetites, inspiring people to seek out new pleasure toys and foreplay games they never knew existed. “Guess what?” exclaims Ms. Allison. “We offer those, too!” Tickle Kitty also serves up its own line of Slippery Kitty FDA-approved lubricants called Slippery Kitty, as well as a branded toy collection for grownups known as Sadie’s Pleasure Kits.

“When you relate to a person’s wants and desires with understanding, respect, thorough information, and just the right touch of humor, they get excited, inspired, and most of all, impassioned,” she says. “Finding or reviving your sexuality is the most glorious and natural way to feel better about yourself and your life.”

The Post has a new article about Dating in D.C., “according to recent Census Bureau data, the District has the lowest ratio of single men to single women in the nation. Kelly Ann Collins, chronicler of the D.C. singles scene … offer[s] advice to women fighting the odds.”

You would think it would be easy for a man to find his perfect match in DC, right?. More’s not better. I am so happy to have hung up my date shoes, focusing instead on business.

I have been on VOX since its launch but only last week did they open it up to anyone who wants to join.

So, watch my VOX step-by-step online video tutorial and then go ahead and join VOX and get involved. My VOX address is chrisabraham.vox.com — come say hello.

One of my dearest friends and clinical psychologist, Monique, popped me a Power Point presentation she researched and presented to her class on the topic of “Hooking Up.” She allowed me to publish the results here and they are rather quite compelling.

“Post hookup feelings of regret” was most interesting, “women’s feelings of regret centered on shame and self blame, compounded by not knowing their partner and lack of further contact with partner” while “men’s feelings of regret centered on a unattractive choice of hookup partner.”

Clinical Psychology Research on “Hooking Up” in College courtesy of Monique Moore

Definition
Hooking up (Paul, McManus & Hayes, 2000):

A sexual encounter which may or may not include sexual intercourse, usually occurring on only one occasion between two people who are strangers or brief acquaintances.

Frequency of Hookups
Paul & Hayes, 2002 survey of 187 college students (155 women, 32 men)

- 70% overall had participated in at least 1 hookup. (75% of men, 84% of women). Of that proportion, 91% had had more than one.

- Average number of hookups for both genders 10.28 (SD 11.22) during their college career
No significant difference between men/women in frequency of hookups

General statistics on hookups
Paul & Hayes, 2002

- 55% of students said that hookups involve anonymous partners

- 49% report that hookups are planned in terms of occurrence but not choice of partner

- 60% believe that either men or women are the instigators, whereas 28% believe that men are the instigators. 3% believe that women are the instigators

During hookups
Paul & Hayes, 2002

- 58% report that alcohol or drugs are typically present, 35% only alcohol, only 6% neither drugs nor alcohol

- 69% believe that hookup partners do not communicate, 25% think that partners engage in small talk, 4% say partners talk about what’s happening, 2% talk about future meeting, 1% talk about sexual history

- 16% of individuals who hooked up felt pressured during the hookup, whereas 34% felt out of control during the hookup (Paul, McManus & Hayes, 2000)

Post hookup
Men and women differed in what their feelings of regret consisted of (Paul & Hayes, 2002).

- Women’s feelings of regret centered on shame and self blame, compounded by not knowing their partner and lack of further contact with partner

- Men’s feelings of regret centered on a unattractive choice of hookup partner

Post Hookup
Other research suggests (Paul, McManus, & Hayes 2000) that post hookup

- 28% of participants that ‘hooked up’ but did not have intercourse and 49% of those that did have intercourse never saw their partner again

- Only 12% of all hookup participants indicated that a hookup evolved into a romantic relationship, that average length of which was 4 months.

Pluralistic Ignorance and hooking up
Pluralistic ignorance (Allport, 1924):

- When each individual in a group believes that their private attitudes are discrepant from the standard displayed by the public behavior of others. Accordingly, each group member conforms to their perception of the group standard, while believing that they are the only ones who don’t privately uphold it.

Research suggests (Lambert, Kahn & Apple, 2003)

- College students evaluated their own comfort level with hooking up as significantly lower than their estimate of same sex peer (F (1,262)= 7.55, p<.01). This effect was more pronounced for men.
Both men and women significantly overestimate the other gender's actual comfort with various hooking up behavior

Pluralistic Ignorance and Hooking up
Pluralistic Ignorance may be compounded by the communication surrounding hookups

- Many individuals say they discuss ONLY their positive hookup experiences with their friends, which may create a glorified norm that doesn’t accurately represent many hookup experiences. A vicious cycle ensues where if the hookup doesn’t meet the positive standards, students self blame and hide the experience, which just reinforces the positive standard (Paul & Hayes, 2002)

Personality and situational variables’ influence in hookups
What distinguishes individuals who don’t hookup (N-HU), from those who hookup without intercourse (HU), and who those who hookup with intercourse (HU-S)? (Paul, McManus & Hayes, 2000)

- Alcohol intoxication and fear of loss of individuality increases across hookup groups (N-HU HU-S individuals are differentiated from other groups by high impulsivity, low concern for personal safety, low dependency, and desire for high autonomy

Personality and situational variables’ influence in hookups
HU-S individuals are distinguished from HU individuals by a game playing love style (sexual conquest rather than connection)

- N-HU individuals prefer not to be the center of attention, are not fearful of intimacy, are least likely to have a game playing orientation toward partners, and are highest on self-esteem and have significantly longer romantic relationship commitments (M = 28.3, SD=19.95.) versus other groups (MHU=17.41, SD = 16.37 M HU-S=14.3, SD =14.3)

“In the bitingly funny, razor-sharp I Love You, Nice to Meet You, platonic friends Kevin Bleyer (“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart???) and Lori Gottlieb give the no-holds-barred low-down on coupling up from the both the male and female points of view. Or as they like to put it, “Twice the perspective, half the insight??? (after all, what do they know – they’re still single).”

“Like romance anthropologists, Lori and Kevin deconstruct every key moment in the lifecycle of a relationship, from what the fake purse-grab really means when the check comes (how hard is it to find your wallet in a purse the size of doughnut?) to fighting etiquette (Is all fair when love is war?) to who gets “home couch advantage??? in couples therapy. Based on stories from their own dating experiences (funny for you, mortifying for them), I Love You, Nice to Meet You is a hilarious and eye-opening collection of “anecdates??? from a guy and a girl who just want to find the one but – lucky for you – haven’t.”

What People are Saying about I Love You, Nice to Meet You : A Guy and a Girl Give the Lowdown on Coupling Up

“The best new funny book about dating on planet Earth, perhaps in the entire universe, and certainly in the Milky Way. Even Tolstoy and God together couldn’t write something as funny and cool and weird and wonderful as this.”
—Molly Jong-Fast, author of Normal Girl and The Sex Doctors in the Basement

“I Love You, Nice to Meet You is funny, affecting, blunt and useful. Kevin and Lori are generous to old flames (well, most of them) and unsparing on themselves. This book may or may not help you find true happiness. But it will give you good, sound advice about what not to talk about over that first cup of coffee, or what items that are best not displayed in your medicine cabinet. Their alternating interpretations make us laugh at the gaffes we have all committed in hope of love. But they still hold out hope for love.”
—Scott Simon, host of NPR’s Weekend Edition Saturday

“For lonely urban singles, here–finally–is a warm, witty companion to crawl into bed at night with. The bad news is it’s a book. The good news is, “I Love You, Nice to Meet You” is very funny, only costs a low one-time fee, and won’t call you regularly at 1 a.m. ‘just to say hi’ (I forget in which chapter, but it’s covered). Shake up a cosmo for one and enjoy.”
—Sandra Tsing Loh, author of A Year in Van Nuys“The funniest book about dating to date. Gottlieb and Bleyer guide us through the twists and turning points in every relationship, providing insight, fresh perspectives, personal anecdotes and hearty laughs along the way. Read it in one big gulp, or savor slowly, bite by bite.”
—Valerie Frankel, author of Hex and the Single Girl and The Girlfriend Curse

“It’s amazing that this is a funny book because this is one exhaustingly detailed compendium of everything that could ever go wrong in every stage a love relationship. At long last, you, the book buying public, will never again have to actually participate in this barbaric uncivilized ritual to become the grizzled cynical veteran of bad love you were destined to be. For this we all owe Kevin Bleyer and Lori Gottlieb a debt of gratitude.”
—Merrill Markoe, original head writer of The Late Show with David Letterman and author of It’s My F—ing Birthday: A Novel.

“Sure, chivalry died. But it got replaced by something much funnier–and luckily Lori Gottlieb and Kevin Bleyer are here to describe it. In dueling essays, the authors spar, match wits, and reveal startling truths about contemporary relationships.Whether you’re searching for the soulmate you have yet to meet, or getting increasingly irritated at the one you found already, this book provides the antidote: pure laughter.”
—Jenny Lyn Bader, co-author He Meant, She Meant: The Definitive Male-Female Dictionary

Reviews of I Love You, Nice to Meet You : A Guy and a Girl Give the Lowdown on Coupling Up

“Knowing that bad dates make good stories, Gottlieb (Stick Figure: A Diary of My Former Self) and Bleyer, a writer for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, share a collection of “anecdates” in this he-said she-said guide to “coupling up” that has not infrequent flashes of true hilarity—a rarity among the ever swelling ranks of humorous dating guides. The authors, good friends who have never been an item (“not now, not then”), provide individual interpretations on the standard fare of relationship topics, but cleverly; chapter titles include “Venue Ask Her Out – Is ‘location, location, location’ the key to getting a second date?” and “I’ll Show You Mine, If You Show Me How – Is there any civilized way to get naked with a new lover?” Insights such as “If you cry about anything less than the death of a mother…you’re doomed,” “Oprah is pornography for women” and “a week of uninterrupted physical presence isn’t a sign of love. It’s a stakeout,” make Gottlieb and Bleyer’s stiff shots of wisdom go down more like a fizzy summertime cocktail, helping to make the dating game, if not always fun, at least fun to read about.”
—Publishers Weekly

I took a four-mile run this afternoon and ended up at the Capitol Hill WSC expecting to do some weight strength training only to find that I couldn’t even fake it.

So I cornered the lovely Sandi and booked five sessions of personal training with Mia for Monday at 8, Tuesday and Wednesday at 6, Thursday at 9, and Friday at 6. If I have a date with you on any of those dates at any of those times, you’re bumped.

I have also scheduled runs for noon each day of the week. Gerris and the river call and I really would like to compete on a club level by later this season.

Also, I have a gentleman’s bet with Justin that will be very costly if I don’t lose lots of weight, gain lots of muscle, and drop my waist size substantially. And if I can’t pay up, Justin will break my kneecaps, I am pretty sure — or he’ll surely try and we’ll both get pretty messed up.

Plus, I am single in the city. What more can I say. It’s not all about sculling!

Guys, if you are too cheap to actually subscribe to Match.com for a month or two and if you think that a wink will give you any traction with the ladies then you’re sadly mistaken.

Saying “I am ending my free trial by tomorrow so please email me at cabraham at gmail dot com” is tantamount to meeting a girl at a bar and expecting her to pick up your tab. The same goes for winks.

Winks are created so that women can more safely reach out to us men without exposing themselves too much (or feeling too desperate). Its surely not a tool that we men should ever use.

Its a sign of bad breeding, I would go so far as to say.

Send a message. Take a risk. Be a man, man.

“Part of my interest in chemistry.com is curiosity about how people describe themselves and potential matches.”

“Many men use capital letters when describing the fact that they are good LISTENERS and RESPECT women. Others take great pains to make clear that money isn’t everything. A portion of one individual’s profile made me laugh and sigh. He said, ‘I’m looking for a kind woman who always returns her shopping cart to the cart corral… ‘ I loved that. That image said so much, and said it so gently.”

So goes Part IV of the series of reports* my comely and anonymous single female reporter about Chemistry.com, a premium property of Match.com.

See also Part I: Chemistry.com Through a Woman’s Eyes, Part II: Signing Up For Chemistry.com from a Woman’s Perspective and Part III: A Cute Woman Wants a Cute Man from Chemistry.com.

*Editor’s Note: I, Chris Abraham, am underwriting the Chemistry.com subscription fee for my lovely and anonymous female friend for blog fodder. I really want to see what the experience is for a woman on a dating site. And I am betting you might want to experience it right along with me. This will be a continuing series following my cute and available friend through her Chemistry.com experiences at almost real time. Enjoy!

MySpace is in the news.

Why? Because kids are short-sighted morons who do exactly what I will tell you not to do in by upcoming blogging workshops: leave your diary in your nightstand, offline.

Come visit my MySpace space: http://www.myspace.com/chrisabraham and my MySpace blog, http://blog.myspace.com/chrisabraham.

I joined forever ago but I have really done nothing with it and have no plans to reveal my innermost innermost, except for fun and out of a sense of mischeviousness.

Although I got a late start, I enjoyed visiting The Writer’s Center Open House last Saturday from 12-3 as an instructor.

Since I am a new instructor, I got to wear the official name tag.

People walked up and asked me questions. The name tag is awesome because you know how shy I am. A conversation starter.

There was wine and a table full of snacks. Also lots of writing course instructors, all of whom I don’t know and didn’t have the opportunity to meet; although, when I perused the list of instructors, I was very impressed…

I am really looking forward to my series of one-day workshops on blogging and the blogosphere:

Schedule of Classes for Blogging Workshops

A Blog of Your Own: How to Write Your World
Start Date: 2/28/2006
Meeting Day: Tuesday
Time: 12:00 PM to 1:00 PM
Instructor: CHRISTOPHER J ABRAHAM
Level: Intermediate
Venue: Arlington Arts Center
Description: Okay, you have a blog and consider yourself a blogger. The next step is how to build your prestige, your readership, and your reputation. This class will demystify process of taking your humble personal blog and developing it into a respected voice, an influential opinion leader, and a popular resource. Being brilliant, funny, insightful, and inspired is just the beginning, learn how to help your hungry audience find you.…more

Blogs, Blogging, and the Blogosphere: Influence World Culture from the Comfort of Your Writing Room
Start Date: 4/11/2006
Meeting Day: Tuesday
Time: 7:00 PM to 9:30 PM
Instructor: CHRISTOPHER J ABRAHAM
Level: All Levels
Venue: Arlington Arts Center
Description: Blogs are no longer just online personal diaries. Blogs and bloggers have become powerful influences in world culture. Blogs have uniquely been able to jump the rails into traditional media and bloggers are now routinely being quoted in the news and on television. This one-day class will explain why blogs have changed the balance of media power and how you can cheaply, easily, and powerfully take advantage of it. There has never been a time when it is so easy and possible to become part of a global conversation.…more

Starting a Blog of One’s Own
Start Date: 2/21/2006
Meeting Day: Tuesday
Time: 12:00 PM to 2:00 PM
Instructor: CHRISTOPHER J ABRAHAM
Level: Beginner
Venue: Arlington Arts Center
Description: Writing for online consumption is much different from writing for the page. Learn how to write for the Internet and the blogosphere in this one-day class focused on the unique and powerful way the blogosphere communicated and how you can best leverage your own personal passion, your own personal artistic voice, and your unique perception of the world into an online organ that very well could change the world.…more

“Lionel Richie is so concerned over his scary skinny daughter Nicole’s health that he has hired her an eating coach, reports the new issue of In Touch Weekly.” Via OH NO!

Enjoy my complete coverage with The Nicole Richie Diet, Nicole Richie is Wasting Away Beautifully, Nicole Richie’s Diet Regimen, Who Knows Nicole Richie’s Diet Regimen, LEAVE NICOLE RICHIE ALONE !!!!, I Love Nicole I Want to Look Like Her, Any Suggestions?, and Nicole Richie is Just Not Eating. Enjoy!

Nicole Richie Coverage: Nicole Richie’s Workout, Nicole Richie’s Diet, Comprehensive Nicole Richie Diet Coverage, To the Richies: What the Hell is an Eating Coach?, The Nicole Richie Diet

Most Popular Articles on ChrisAbraham.com, Nicole Richie is Wasting Away Beautifully, The Only Reason I Blog: The Continuing Nicole Richie Saga, Nicole Richie’s Diet Regimen, Who Knows Nicole Richie’s Diet Regimen, LEAVE NICOLE RICHIE ALONE !!!!, Nicole Richie is Just Not Eating is Most Commented Article, I Love Nicole I Want to Look Like Her, Any Suggestions?, Nicole Richie is Just Not Eating

From a lovely and helpful reader of this blog, Bree, in the comments section of Who Knows Nicole Richie’s Diet Regimen, “OK here it is all those looking for Nicole’s Diet, I havent tried it yet but Im definitly going to!!! hope this helps….” Thanks Bree!

Nicole appears to be shrinking before our eyes. The 23-year-old has hit the gym with a vengeance (2+ hours a day) and now weighs an astonishing 91 stone.

The Diet
Breakfast: 2 Egg Whites; 1 Scoop of Protein Powder mixed with Water.
Lunch: 4oz. Chicken, Mixed Greens, 1c. Orange Juice
Dinner: 4oz. Fish, Steamed Veggies
Dessert: Fruit

The Workout
1 Hour Weight training
90 Minutes of High Impact Cardio
…….although they say……..
Her recent transformation is a prime example of how drastically a balanced diet and increased physical activity can change a person’s appearance. Nicole exercises four times a week and does something different during each session. Besides integral training (cardio and weight work combined) the newly svelte starlet likes to use the indo board for balance and leg work. Furthermore, according to her trainer Adam Estner, “Richie now eats more food than before, but she eats the right kind.???

You might wonder what its like to have your own category on Wonkette. Well, I don’t wonder. Wonkette has an entire category called “Chris Abraham.” Bizarre and wonderful.

My friend Rachel Greenwald wrote a great little book a few years ago called Find a Husband After 35 Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School. Very smart strategy and from my perspective, it would work on me.

As a man, it seems really smart to me. Actually, Maureen Dowd, you need to read it post haste

Rachel uses the business and marketing practices she culled from HBS to find a fulfilling love relationship. This books will appeal to alpha-women because Rachel likes to say that in terms of dating and finding the right man, “you really need to make it your business.”

Find a Husband After 35 Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School

Find a Husband After 35 Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School* is a New York Times Best Seller . The book teaches a proven 15-step program to find a wonderful husband. This is an innovative approach to the frustrating reality of being single at any age, but especially between the ages of 30 and 105. It’s all about taking action and moving forward, not analyzing why you’re still single, who’s to blame, and why society is the way it is.

This book describes “The Program???—a simple to understand 15-step process that uses classic marketing techniques I learned at Harvard Business School.

You will learn how to:

-Devise a “Personal Brand??? and be unique
-“Package??? yourself to improve your appearance
-Use “Niche Marketing??? and “Telemarketing??? in your husband search
-Use “Mass Marketing??? to increase the volume of men you meet
-Maximize “Online Marketing??? to attract the best men from online dating sites
-Use “Advertising??? to get more fix-ups from friends
-“Audit??? your efforts and conduct “Exit Interviews???
-Use “Best Practice??? dating rules for retaining the men you want

You will also learn the answers to:

-What are the unique dating issues for women after 35 and how do I handle them?
-Where do I find older single men?
-What are the small things I can do every day to meet more men?
-What is the “Date/Sex Rule????
-What is the most over-looked resource for finding a husband?

Every ten months or so, Maureen Dowd pitches a fit. And its always a rehash of the same jagged little pill: “the more successful the woman, the less likely it is she will find a husband or bear a child. For men, the reverse is true.”

Yes, we know, we know. And it just isn’t fair. Call it karma.

You, Maureen, are incapable of intimacy, incapable of compromise, incapable of acceptance, and incapable of weathering adversity. You, Maureen, are incapable of maintaining the vows of marriage — not because you cannot but because you refuse to out of indignant rage! You both want to participate in the Sacrament of holy matrimony while still holding onto your ego, while still not willing to relinquish yourself to your partner, to your husband, to your friend, to your spouse! We men are not too dumb to realize that we’re an extension of your “life’s goals” list rather than something your heart really wants. If she can have it, why can’t I? Why can’t I have it all.

It is always easier to blame someone else rather than yourself. It is always easier to blame a cultural rift or lack — or even an entire gender — than it is to blame yourself.

Consider it payback for the devil may care attitude you bandied about during your twenties when you could have really spent some time investing in relationships, investing in developing your emotional maturity, in working on yourself as a person, as a woman, as a human, and as someone who might at one point be judged not only for how smart, how successful, or how rich you are but rather for how suitable you are as a partner.

You, Maureen Dowd, are not entitled to marriage, a husband, or children through wedlock. You, Maureen Dowd, cannot just will any of this into being. Marriage is not something you can interview yourself into and your success in business, your success in the stock market, you success with money, networking, or even therapy is not an indicator as to how marriageable you are or how fit you are to be a mother or a spouse.

And you certainly cannot use bitterness and righteous indignance to fuel yourself down the aisle and into “the man you deserve’s” arms if he doesn’t want you. And he doesn’t want you because he is intimidated by your success or he is turned off by your age or your wealth or your equality. You, Maureen Dowd, are hot and funny and coy and have amazing legs! Its actually because you are only half-hearted, you are preoccupied, you are not committed, and because after reading this article, you are a harpy, a shrew!

In your teens and twenties, Maureen Dowd, you surely tortured us when we really wanted to marry you. Sure, you gave us quite a lot of sex and for that we are grateful; but a mistress does not a wife make. In our twenties, we men surely had the patience and the energy to work through all of the immaturity and the emotional abyss. We’re men, we are very slow to mature. But no, you manipulated us and made us watch as you upgraded from student to associate, from associate to partner, and from partner to CEO.

By the time we are 35, we are sure of who we are, of what we want, and are far less interested in games, in drama, in pissing about, or in wasting our time. In short, we’re tired of your shit.

At least in DC, 35 means we are ready to settle down and get married and start a family. To be honest, in our thirties, we are dating women in their twenties. Know why? No, not because they’re younger or more beautiful — that is rarely the case — but because women in their twenties are more hopeful, more romantic, more curious, and more impressed by the experiences, the successes, and the creature comforts we have. They think we’re cool, we’re exciting, and we’ve arrived.

And although we don’t have control over who marries us, we do have absolute control over who we marry. And that’s just the way it is.

Life isn’t fair.

“An excerpt from [Maureen Dowd's] new book ‘Are Men Necessary?‘ riles up the blogosphere.” Via Salon

“Please tell all men that the simplest way to woo a woman is to touch her face and hair when he kissed her. It’s really that easy. Thank God not everyone has forgotten that. Oh, and the best way to get to the kiss is to joke about the awkwardness of the moment and ASK HER POLITELY. Seriously. This works.” Consider them told.

All the most eligible bachelors in Washington are making their first date a hike at Great Falls.

It shows that you’re healthy, happy, and have great skills. “Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills.”

If you’re a guy in DC and you want to take a girl on a popular first date, forgo Kramer Books & Afterwords and invite her for a hike at Great Falls.