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The age-old tale of a fat old codger who is slowly becoming a young buck.

Instead of attending a Microsoft schmooze fest in Chevy Chase last night, I took a walk over to Connecticut Avenue to the local GAP.  I grabbed a pair of 38x32 classic fit flat front khakis and for the heck of it a pair of 36x32 khakis. Back to the dressing room, off with the kit, and on with the 36s and guess what?  They fit!

This might sound like something that happens every day, but that is not the case at all.  About a year ago my pants were a cool 42x32.  Now I weigh 235 but a year ago I weighed 285.  285-235=50. Fifty pounds! 

How did I do it?  Well, exercise alone was not cutting it for me because I was too heavy to really pursue vigorous exercise.  The secret to weight loss can be boiled down to two words:

Portion control.

It really doesn’t matter what you eat, although I had a lot of luck doing a little bit of the more protein less carbohydrates diet, but according to the Chinese, my being O+ has a lot to do with my need for meat.

Of course, portion control was a lot easier while I was unemployed.

Another solution I followed is making sure I knew the difference between coffee and dessert.  Sound like an easy thing to know. Well it ain’t always.

So, now I can run.  And ever since I started running again after stopping an eight-miles-a-day habit back in 1993, I have again become addicted to this good for me habit.  And since my passive tendency towards social smoking while drinking bottles of Bud at Zack’s tends to kill my running mojo, I have curtailed a lot of these in the direction of less often. How do I do that without feeling guilty?  By running anyway, even if I am suffering a humongous dose of hair of the dog.  I still run so as to teach me a lesson – or rather, to have my body teach me a lesson.  No better lesson than vomiting into the bushes of your neighbor’s house to keep the inner Bacchus under control.

And if you keep it simple, then it is simple.  When I mess up, I mess up.  I don’t give myself a guilt trip and I keep it really positive.  Giving myself loads of slack is the best thing I find towards insuring a long life.

And for all of that, I am now enjoying the following:

Indicator

Before

After

Pants

42x32

36x32

Shirts

XXL

XL

Underwear

XL

M

Body Weight

285

235

And it gives me such a great feeling of accomplishment, especially since I can again be as sporty as I once was.  I have now taken up a nice host of trendy sports as well: rowing single sculls on the Potomac, ice skating in Reston with Wendy, Golf (to be announced), riding my Pista track bike, running, kayaking, and rollerblades.

Truthfully, it doesn’t get better than this, now does it?  Now if only it would stop raining.

May 29, 2003 12:00 AM