“Marriage is not as simple as just love. I’ve loved men that I wouldn’t marry,” says Stephanie in the comments for Only Ever Marry the Person You Love. I believe that marriage should be less idealistic and more practical than love, myself.
If you wait for the perfect person, you may indeed never marrry. None of my married friends consider their spouse to be their everything.
Having the vapors for someone may be important but if it hasn’t worked for you yet, you’re doing something wrong.
Maybe the person for whom you have the vapors is indeed the last person you should marry — or, indeed, who would choose to marry you.
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Entirely agreed, but my point was that attraction to your spouse is an important element in keeping the marriage alive. (In addition to honesty, the ability to laugh at and with each other, a similar outlook on life, and the ability to communicate, especially about the yucky stuff)
The “perfect” person doesn’t exist, contrary to myth. But the right person for you (at the right time) does. Nor does “happily ever after,” contrary to myth. But happy marriages do.
Chris, you would really dig the book. I’ll give it to you when I’m done.
Women are a whole lot less fussy with their cats. What I learn from pet-ownership is that you have to allow yourself to fall head-over-heals madly in love with the one right in front of you instead of dealling with the drole, cliche, and forever unforgivable, “one day I prince will come.”
Both men and women also need to get over the idea that marriage is going to “rescue” them from anything.