The Washington Post has a four-page article on the Wingman. Only one wingman? Amateurs! In high school and college, I was a member of wingteams. Via Wonkette, Gawker, and the Washington Post.
I had a wingteam in high school. We would go out in teams of three or five. Three to five guys together looks less desperate than two guys lurking.
Let’s say there are only two cute girls. The three guys move in and engage, making one another look funny and cool. One guy is predestined to disappear into the night after things gel. In a team of three or five, there is a simple system of “dibs” sometimes used, although most often the most senior, the most cool, or the most alpha come first while the newest, youngest, or lamest is predestined to break off.
Calling dibs is a serious business when men go out — very serious — and breaking dibs is a serious offense that may result in getting drummed out of the team, also known as “being excommunicated.” Dibs last as long as the the dibsholder likes. We men are never catty and rarely fight over women to say nothing of backstabbing or stealing someone elses dib (of course, it is open season outside of the team).
A single wingman? How pathetic. When I was in high school and college, going out was an orchestrated mission with strategy, with tactics, and with easily-definable goals with success and failure metrics and defined exit strategies.
Women didn’t have a chance.
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Quite fascinating stuff, my friend. It reminds me of the “bump and float” technique we learned during sorority rush.
But I propose that the engagement strategies men employ are a little more subtle and complex than the wingteam phenomenon you describe here. To see what I mean, watch the film “Just Friends” in which poor Amy Smart is assaulted with kids and guitars. Men don’t have to worry about being excommunicated when puppies, tykes, and inanimate objects are involved.
Chris,
This is brilliant, truly brilliant. But let it be known that men aren’t the only ones who utilize this tactic of “winging” to attract and successfully “hook” the opposite sex.
In college, hell even these days up until fairly recently, I had my own team; nay, small nation of “wingwomen” to accompany me out on a night of heavy drinking and bad decisions….
…the difference between wingmen and wingwomen? A good wingwoman will tell you when you’re too good for the prize in question…
Wingteams call the “small nation of wingwomen” the herd. Women in DC use their wingwomen as protection, a check and balance against “heavy drinking and bad decisions” — all defensive strategy — while men use our wingmen and wingteams offensively — we even have strategies on how to get around the “house mum” and the “dense herd” and the “girl who wants to go home” and the “girl who doesn’t like your boy” — the girl who thinks herself “a good wingwoman [who] will tell you when you’re too good for the prize in question” — she’s the worst!
The 1-3 guys who disappeared are always close enough to engage in tactical distraction and redirection…
Apparently, girls call dibs as well:
“I know how women work. Women are always trying to get men because that’s what they like to do, but they play this dibs game with each other. Beautiful girls always call dibs first, but sometimes ugly girls call dibs first, like a wolf pissing on his territory. Well, now an ugly girl has virtually PISSED all over my face and I can’t get any from any H-O-T-T-I-E-S.”
http://astoundingentertainment.com/essays/?p=68
Charming.
Too much traffic taking a whole team into play.
I would generally go into action with a single comrade. Easier to play off of, more focus, less chance of drunken distraction when one of your buddies gets too fucked up. Plus you go after smaller packs.
Larger packs are the worst because your A-Game has to be at it’s best. In large pack you have to impress everybody in order to impress anybody.
Really, you guys talk about this like girls don’t know this is happening. You aren’t as subtle as you think you are- especially not to those of us who are generally the girls your wingmen are talking to. We know who the cute girl getting hit on is, and we fully recognize our power to facilitate or derail your wingteam’s efforts. ;)
And when we play basketball, we know the player on the opposing team against whom we have to put the best defensive player, too. “Dick, make sure you keep on top of Jane.” Sometimes it is worth it to put an entire 1/5th or 1/3rd of your entire wingteam on one opponent.